


Bullshit

by orphan_account



Series: Brand New Sentences [2]
Category: Banana Fish (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Dom/sub Undertones, M/M, Stupidity
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-27
Updated: 2019-02-27
Packaged: 2019-11-06 11:22:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 250
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17938760
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Eiji tries to wake Ash up using an... unconventional method. Completely crack.The quotes my friends said that this was based on:"How do you dominate your sexual partner?" and "Didn't I annoy you into submission last night?"





	Bullshit

Eiji woke up earlier than Ash, like he did Every. Single. Morning. But this time, Eiji was determined to get Ash to wake up on time, on time being earlier than 4:00PM.

He poked Ash whilst he sang Poker Face loudly and off-key in Ash's ear.

Ineffective.

He used Ash as a bongo with one hand whilst he continued to sing his Poker Face karaoke and kept poking him with his free hand.

Still didn't work.

 

Eiji decided he was going to go full out in this grand attempt to wake up Ash. He hoisted Ash into his arms bridal-style and sat him in his car, driving off to the rodeo. Upon arrival, Eiji connected his phone to a bluetooth speaker...

"P-P-P-Poker Face... P-P-Perfect, yay!" he sang along.

He plopped Ash onto a bull and plopped himself on the bull after Ash, effectively crushing him. It was time to go full fucking ham.

He began poking Ash agressively one-handedly whilst trying very hard to stay on the bull. Ash finally, finally began to wake up.

"Eiji, wh-"

Plonk.

"I see you're awake!" Eiji said, checking the time. "9:25AM. Great!"

"Get off your bottom and get us home."

"I'm not a bottom! Didn't I annoy you into submission last night?"

"Oh, come on, Eiji. You certainly annoyed me, but I don't know about the topping part."

"You're right... how does one dominate their sexual partner?"

"Not by trying to wake them up via Poker Face Bull Rodeo, Eiji."

"Noted."


End file.
